Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Day 14: Fear of Being Left Out--Not Getting Invited to a Birthday Party Made Me Cry

And I will walk in and with and among you and will be your God, and you shall be My people.” 
Leviticus 26: 12
Day 14:  Fear of Being Left Out
It is so painful to be left out.  It is incredibly heart-breaking to feel like an outsider...to not be included...to be purposely excluded...to not be invited...to not be part of something that everyone else seems to be a part of. 

I'll never forget the pain I felt when I didn't get invited to a friend's birthday party when I was in 4th grade.  I thought we were friends.  The worst part was that another friend called me from that birthday party to tell me that I didn't get invited.  It was so hurtful.

This pain was so real to me.  It's amazing how even little things like this can feel so big to you as a child. 

Grade school, junior high, high school, and even college were full of moments that I was left out for one reason or another.  In some cases, it was my choice not to go to something; in some cases, my parents wouldn't let me go; but in some cases, I was just plain not invited to go.  Regardless of the reason, it was always difficult to be left out.  I know all of us, at one point or another, have gone through this pain in our lives. 

Recently, I experienced a very powerful dream after I had made a choice that took me away from what was comfortable to me...away from a place I thought God was leading me...away from the direction that my friends were going.  And even though it was my choice, I still had those fears of being left out...that I would miss out on being a part of something...that my friends were moving on without me.

In my dream, I saw all my friends at a party laughing together as I was standing outside in the rain peaking in the window.  It was just like in the movies.  I experienced an incredible sadness.  It was like that feeling I had in 4th grade all over again.  Everyone was at the party but me. 

Still dreaming, God took my hand and led me away in a different direction.  As I was holding His hand, I kept looking over my shoulder so desperately wanting to be where all of my friends were...so desperately wanting to be included...so desperately wanting to be free from the pain of feeling completely left out.  I cried.

But as I walked farther away hand in hand with my Creator, instead of feeling fear and sadness, I felt overwhelmed with peace and joy. 

Soon, I began to focus on where He was taking me.  Soon, I began to get excited about the possibilities that He had in front of me.  My fears were gone. 

I woke up feeling so grateful for my Father knowing that I needed Him to take away my fear of being left out.  I woke up feeling grateful that He brought me such peace in that moment where I felt so much anxiety.  I woke up feeling grateful for the wisdom and confidence that comes with growing older.  I woke up feeling grateful knowing that when I follow Christ, there is always peace, regardless of my earthly fears. 

I want everyone to know the peace that comes when we choose to follow God's path for our lives no matter how much our fear of being left out makes us want to do otherwise. 

Are you ready to release your fears of being left out?  Are you willing to allow God to take your hand and lead you in His direction?

Father, I give my fear of being left out to You.  Thank You for bringing me out of a painful experience and showing me that I'm not being left out, but that I'm being led out by You!  Thank You for taking my hand, walking with me, and giving me comfort and peace.  Thank You for living among us and being our Guide.  Help me to continue to be obedient to Your word and to follow Your path for my life.  And even though I may feel left out at times, nothing matters unless I am following You.  Father, shine Your light into my fear of being left out, and allow me to walk boldly forward, holding Your hand, filled with faith, and ready to serve You in all that I do!  In Jesus' name.  Amen.
Start from the beginning of the 31 Fears to Conquer Through Faith:  http://christineleeb.blogspot.com/2014/10/31-fears-to-conquer-through-faith.html

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