I started bawling the other night. My husband looked at me funny and said, "what's wrong?" I just had a moment when I was looking at pictures of my kids up on the wall from this past summer and realized how quickly they were growing up and I just wanted time to stand still. I wanted them to stay exactly as they were, and I knew that wasn't possible. And I cried. And I cried...and I cried. I knew that I needed to spend more time with them while they were still young...while they still wanted me to play with them. So good bye blogging and hello more time with my family.
Blogging once a week every week for 6 months has been wonderful. When I started this blog in June, I decided to dedicate myself to writing and posting something every week no matter what, and I stuck to it. (for the most part--I am a busy mom, you know.) I feel incredibly blessed to have had the opportunity to share with so many of you some of my stories and was able to show you how God's light shined in each and every time. With much prayer, I have decided to take a break from blogging. I am going to keep writing my stories though on the side when I have time as I've been doing that too in addition to creating them into blogs. In 2013, my main goal is to dedicate more time to my family. Really...intentionally...dedicate more time to my kids, my husband, my parents, my brother and his family, my husband's parents...my family!
Writing takes time. Blogging takes time. Putting my heart into every story takes time. And the more I realized how much time I was taking away from my family in order to blog, I knew that it was time to hit the pause button...not stop...just pause for now. Having 2 kids that I love, adore and want to spend time with, having a husband who I love, adore and want to spend time with, plus directing a moms' ministry that I put so much love and heart into, PLUS, laundry, cleaning, planning meals, cleaning, cooking meals, cleaning, playdates, cleaning, organizing and, oh yeah, cleaning, it really came to light how much throwing in a blog every week was very time consuming. Well, maybe I should consider taking a break from cleaning while I'm at it. I wish!!
Something that can be both good and bad about me is that I am one of those people that when I set a goal for myself, I do everything in my power to work to accomplish that goal. In order to accomplish writing a blog every week, some of my blogs were written with a young toddler hanging on my leg crying "Hold you, mommy! Hold you!" and a 4 year old yelling "Come be the bad guy mommy!" I just can't do it all, and that's ok. I can't do everything well and still be able to be with my kids, and that's the reality of motherhood. So I'm choosing motherhood over bloggerhood. Not to say that I will never blog again. I may throw in a random blog here and there as God leads me, but I'm not going to commit to blogging every week. It's too much time...at least for now in the season of life that I'm in.
I want to say thank you. Thank you to those of you who took the time to read my blogs. Thank you to those of you who took the time to let what I wrote sink in. Thank you to those of you who used my stories to shine God's light into your own lives. And thank you to those of you who took the time to give me words of encouragement and let me know how much you enjoyed reading my blogs. To God be the glory! But hey, now you'll have an extra few minutes to spend with your family too instead of reading my blog every week. lol. So, it's win-win for everyone!
Well, I'm off to hold my little girl so tightly while I chase Spiderman around the house as I yell "Arg! Arg! I'm going to get you Spiderman!" Time with my kids is so precious.
I want to leave you with my favorite bible verse. I have had this verse memorized since I was a child and the older I get, the more meaningful it becomes. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Proverbs 3: 5-6. May you always trust God. May you always allow Him to guide you and direct you to exactly where He wants you to go!